Divide and conquer the problem into smaller parts.
Get your stage lighting understanding your 3D space in TD. In otherwords, create a mapping between your real-world stage lights and your virtual 3D stage in TD so you can give your lights a lookat position in 3d space in TouchDesigner and your light points to an expected postion on stage.
Do the same for Kinect positions, map them from your real world stage into your virtual 3D stage in TD. This part is mostly about getting the scale and orientation correct.
The last part is now simple, just swap any Kinect position from the sensor in as a lookat for your lights and voilà!